Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Big Texas-Sized Love

What is the point of worry? Does it help us to deal with sad and difficult things? Does it allow us to process each detail so we can feel better equipped to handle the worst outcome? Or does it just spin our brains into cyclical negative spirals?

I ask this because I've thought a lot about it this week. When you're far from home and something big happens to someone in your family it's difficult to be so far away. Not that my being in France and not Texas has any effect on what's happening there...that's a selfish emotion. Being far away when something is happening doesn't mean you would have been able to be any closer to the situation if you were actually geographically closer. I feel close to it from way over here and so I have two choices. This is the crux of what I've been thinking. I can worry and think of all the bad things that could happen. Or I can send love, strength and hope through positive non-worry thoughts.

In my past experience as a hard-core worrier I've found that it really doesn't help in dealing with troubling things nor does it prepare you if the worst happens. It only makes you sad and nervous and in turn send out all that negative toward the person or thing you're worrying over. And if things go south all that worry doesn't make it any easier in the light of harsh reality. Save your energy for the off chance of a downturn.

I've also found that things usually turn out better than I expected. The moves my family has made abroad have taught me this. Living in France, learning the language, putting the kids in French school, finding a house, blah, blah, blah. None of it worth worrying over. It's all worked out.
I firmly believe that I personally have wasted way too much energy on negative worry. And with this realization, France helped, I have given it up. I've gone cold turkey on worrying. And I've found that believing the best rather than worrying about the worst makes a difference; in how I feel, how I behave, even in the outcome of things in my life.
It's with these thoughts in mind that I send love, hope and strength to my family in Texas. I ask those of you who read this to do the same. There's power there.

I promise tomorrow I'll post something light and more like me...it's going to be about our car--20 years old, Irish plates and right-hand drive. Quite an attention getter. Stay tuned.
And thanks.


  1. Aidan, sending many positive vibes your (and Texas') way. Hope it all works out okay, and you're right, it usually does in the end.

    I'm usually okay with worries throughout the day, I can nix them pretty quickly and find a way to turn it around. My hard time is at night, just after I lay my head on my pillow. I tend to think too much then, and a lot of that thinking is just worrying. It's pointless, unproductive and some times I think a little self indulgent. I'm working on stopping it too. Worry Busters 2010, here we come!

  2. Worrying for those who are far away from us is only normal, I have the same feeling when my son in LA has a problem. But as you say, attitude is everithing. Let me quote what I read a few days ago:
    'Instead of greeting the day with my usual, 'Good God, morning!' I consciously said, 'Good morning, God!' with the expectation that it would be a good day.'
    Love, hope and stregth have been sent.

  3. I'm sending all the good vibes I can muster to Texas, and to you I'm sending big Texas sized hugs OOO and a kiss x

  4. I am a total worry wart. I worry about EVERYTHING and it totally eats me up inside. I'm convinced the only reason I've maintained my weight eating croissants in Paris is because I probably burn the pastries off worrying! I agree that sometimes you just need to go cold turkey and let things go. I'm trying hard to remember this as I get my life together in France. Thanks for writing this post. Here's to a worry free rest of the week!

  5. All I can say is a Big Ol' Thank You to all of you wonderful people. This barrage of positive energy is just what I was hoping for with this post. It's like my own version of a prayer chain. I feel so thankful to have all of you along with me, even if it's only virtually, it's still real!
    Big Love back at you. All.
    xo aidan


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